Getting Even or Getting Ahead in Divorce

Getting Even or Getting Ahead in Divorce

Preparing for Battle

Divorce revenge is all too real. Those who feel hurt or betrayed by their spouse may fantasize about getting even in the divorce. Keying cars, destroying personal possessions, draining bank accounts, and spreading rumors are commonly employed as revenge tactics in divorce. It can be tempting to dig your heels in and adopt a battle mentality in divorce. Getting even in this way, however, can cost you in wasted assets and legal fees. If you want to get even in the divorce, pause for a second and think about the alternatives.

Choose Your Battles Wisely

The point of getting even or taking revenge on your spouse is to make him or her hurt. You can try to do this by fighting for sole custody, certain assets, or for a generous alimony award. I see this all the time in the field of divorce law. You can choose to seek revenge by taking your divorce to court, but is that really the best way? Getting even in a divorce doesn’t provide lasting happiness. Long-term, an amicable and fair divorce is a better provider of happiness and stability.

Instead of getting even, get ahead. The best revenge is success, not just in the divorce settlement, but also in life. Fighting for a fair divorce settlement that will provide you financial security is more important than draining your spouse’s bank accounts. Even though “getting everything” in the divorce may seem like the best revenge, it can make it harder for your spouse to meet his or her basic living expenses. And, hurting your spouse in this way can also hurt your child.

Getting ahead is deceptively simple. You can gain a sense of control and moral superiority in the situation if you work toward a fair separation agreement and a reasonable parenting plan. Make sure you divide your assets and debts equitably. Also, work together to make sure your child’s best interests are protected in the divorce. Consider divorce mediation if you want to have an amicable and equitable divorce. Mediation can help you achieve your divorce goals while keeping costs, stress, and emotional turmoil to a minimum.

Are you contemplating divorce? Mediation Advantage Services is here to help. Polly A. Tatum is highly experienced in Massachusetts family law and can help you reach your divorce goals while still being fair. Based in historic Worcester with a satellite office in Northboro, MA, our firm serves all cities and towns throughout Massachusetts and Worcester County including, Auburn, Paxton, Leicester, Sutton, Grafton, Shrewsbury, Westboro, Northboro, Southboro, Holden, Sterling, Princeton, Worcester, Charlton, Millbury, Dudley, Spencer, Brookfield, Sudbury, Natick, Framingham, Hopkinton, Milford, Blackstone, Leominster, Fitchburg, Acton, Jefferson, Barre, Oakham, Cambridge, Newton, Marlboro, Lancaster, Bolton, and Hudson. Call our office at (508) 645-6374, fill out our online form, or email us at info@mediationadvantage.com today to schedule your Complimentary Mediation Success Planning Session. You can also sign up for our eNewsletter or download our free e-book for more information regarding divorce in Massachusetts.

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